It's a beautiful autumnal Saturday - the first Saturday I haven't had a gig in weeks - and I'm feeling pretty pants. I've felt gross all week, actually. Before I know it, it's 4pm and I'm back in hospital for a lovely two night stay.
I hate being ill for so many reasons, but I particularly hate letting people down. I work with several different bands and have a lot of lovely students, and I never want to make the phone call that says I can't make a gig or a lesson. This leads to supreme feelings of guilt which mean that I spend all my time worrying which really slows down the recovery process.
What I I need to remember is that I shouldn't need to feel like I can't be sick unless I'm really sick and on a drip. It should be okay for me to wake up, acknowledge how I feel, and take a rest day; in the long run, I'll get better quicker and won't waste precious days in hospital or out of action. I know that ignoring all the obvious symptoms I have and pushing through ultimately leads to feeling worse.
Basically, what this all boils down to is wherever and whenever possible, I need to be held accountable for how I feel. There are always, always things I can do to make myself feel better, some that I do now, and some that I definitely don't but need to start.
So, here is my plan. If I share it, I'll definitely feel a responsibility to stick with it!
Structure and Routine
I am the QUEEN of procrastinating. Sometimes it’s because I genuinely feel gross so can't make myself concentrate, but a lot of the time it's because I'm easily distracted. At the moment I'm really lucky to be so busy, but it means I'm splitting my time between learning lines, learning songs, and learning saxophone parts. It feels overwhelming, so I need to break it all down and structure my day into manageable chunks, otherwise the whole day stretches in front of me and everything feels unmanageable. Man, I love a timetable.
Eating and Drinking
This feel so obvious that it almost seems ridiculous to write it down, but I have to remember to EAT. I tend to forget for the first half of the day and then just snack my way through the afternoon and evening. My boyfriend is an awesome cook (and very into being healthy, which I'm slowly getting on board with...) and has made some delicious, healthy meals recently and this inspires me to cook for him too. My favourite meal I've made recently is Deliciously Ella's Mushroom risotto, which is made with coconut milk; it's genius and tastes amazing, even when being made by a very average chef (that's me.) I'm really getting in to searching for recipes and trying new things. It's very unlike me but I'm trying to rise to the kitchen challenge.
My other mission is to drink wayyyyy more water. I got really told off in hopitall because my blood pressure kept dropping, which can normally be prevented with HYDRATION. So, now, every time I want a cup of tea, I have to drink a pint of water first. I'm adding slices of lemon because I'm a cool dude.
I'm moving in a couple of weeks, and the idea of having a stress free/clutter free environment is so exciting to me. I've been Pinteresting my heart out looking for inspiration to create the perfect personal space. We're really lucky as the house we're moving in to has the most beautiful view of the South Downs, which is so calming; nothing helps with my anxiety more than a walk outside.
This may seem irrelevant, maybe even frivolous, but I want to make sure that when I wake up and get dressed, I feel comfortable and I feel good. I'll be clearing out my wardrobe (and taking stuff to a charity shop) to get rid of clothes that I haven't worn in ages, or clothes that feel more like pyjamas, or clothes that remind me of things I don't want to be reminded of.
Please let me know your advice to live a healthier, happier life! What do you make sure you have in your personal space? How do you take a break? What are your favourite things you've cooked recently?